I was with a friend at a restaurant last week, and we were waiting to be seated. Many groups were waiting for tables, and this little kid with one of the groups began crying… loudly. You know what I’m talking about… when you go out, there’s always that kid who is screaming, throwing a tantrum, or kicking random strangers in the shins.
Anyway, this kid– not a baby, mind you – kept screaming, and wouldn’t calm down. I finally said to my friend, “That kid really needs to shut up“. She looked at me and asked if I ever wanted to have kids. My response?
“Sure…
… if I have a frontal lobotomy first.”
I’ve met lots of you out there in the blogosphere. For those I haven’t met, if you want to see if I’m a toothless hag or not, I put some pics in the About section. No, not nude pics… get your minds out of the gutter. I’m the only one around here who’s supposed to have a dirty mind… and mouth.
Anyway, don’t go posting my headshots on TKC’s body, people. And if you put my head on any porn stars, make sure to send me a copy.
I went to the check out counter at a store the other day, and I didn’t want one of the items in my hand. (I’m a girl and we change our minds a lot, you know.) This young guy was working, and I told him I didn’t want the item, and I asked if it was okay if for me to give it to him. Instead of saying “fine” or “that’s okay”, the guy says “That’s chill”.
That’s chill?
I gave him this puzzled look, and he must have realized I was older than he thought. So then he said, “Yeah, I mean that’s fine”. At that moment, I felt really, really old.
I visited my mom and grandma last Sunday, and I brought along some Mexican Train dominoes. I thought we’d just have a friendly little game. Uh, that didn’t work out so well.
My mom had never played before, and she hated the game right from the start. Plus, she thought I was making up the rules as I went along. I got out the rules, but she was too annoyed with me to actually read them. My grandma got upset whenever someone played on her domino train. She would yell out “piss on you” or “you little shit ass” when it happened. It got to where I was playing on her train just so I could hear new variations of cuss words. (I’ve talked about my grandma’s dirty mouth before.)
After only one round, we called it quits. But a few weeks ago, I went with my cousin to visit some of our family. Several of us ended up playing Mexican Train… for 4 hours. Cuss words were flying all over the place. At one point when I was going to win a round, I said, “I’m about to bring a shit storm down on you people.”
I guess it’s safe to say that the dirty mouth runs in the family.